Negative people, they are everywhere in this society. If you want to protect yourself, that’s nearly impossible, because maybe some of your relatives fall into this category.
“So what can we do?
Live with them and become one of the vampires?”
No, that’s not what I am suggesting. One can indeed become affected quicker by bad qualities, than good ones. But if we know the magic mantras, a shield will protect us.
No, I am not writing a fairytale. There are some techniques which you can apply to protect yourself from negativity, and you’ll not become one of the vampires.
But before revealing the secret mantras, let’s see the type of pessimistic people.
I thought about it for a while and did some research on this topic. After that, I can say there are (generally) three types of negative people; A) Occasional Negative, B) Good Negative, C) Truly Negative.
A) Occasional Negative
These types of people won’t always discourage you. It is upon their mood and what they think. If they believe what are you doing is not safe or if they do not have any idea about that particular thing, then they will discourage you. These people like to give free unwanted knowledge to everybody.
Sometimes they will give you bad advice because they can’t see you successful.
If they are in trouble, Occasional Negatives will tell you how it is the hardest thing they ever encounter. And how they are trying to solve it but not victorious.
By sharing their despair, they will relive themselves, using you as a punching bag.
B) Good Negative
These types of people are good critique. Before giving you any advice, they will research the topic, see your stance, your capabilities, then give any comment.
If the opportunity is not suitable for you, they will discourage, but if it is fit for you, then they will encourage.
We need these genuine critiques, but they are rare.
Good negatives will seldom share their problems. But if they did, try to comfort them.
C) Truly Negative People
These energy vampires will always hinder your motivation, nevertheless if you are doing a good or bad thing.
They will suck all positive energy and fill you with despair.
These people are always negative about you and everything else. But that’s not mean that they will tell you about their life’s problems. If they are too pride, they present their lifestyle as perfect. And sometimes we encounter truly negatives, who will glorify their life’s difficulties and tell you how negative his/her life is.
My advice will be; don’t deal with these folks, they are too dangerous. But if you have to, then follow the tips below.
Now Let’s See The Top 10 Ways To Deal With Negative People
Don’t Become Their Problem Solver
If you know, someone will not listen to you, why in earth you will give them advice? But we all tend to do it. We like to share free Gyan! Even I’m doing it. The only difference is that; you were searching for advice. I mean, that’s why you clicked this article.
First try the person, if he is even eligible for your guidance or not. If he only talks about himself and the problems, then don’t waste your time.
He is searching for comfort, not a solution. So give him what he wants, tell him what he wants to listen.
See it’s not your responsibility to make everyone happy. And this is not even possible. If a person has no intention to improve, then you can only encourage him.
But it’s upon your hand, your responsibility to make yourself happy. Because at the end of the journey no one will go with you on your death bed.
Don’t Tell Your Secrets
Some people like to converse about a person who not even present in that conversation.
They will tell you bad things, like, how he/she is doing something wrong or how his/her life is in a mess.
The only problem is, the person they are telling you about is not even there!
It is a dangerous habit, and you can’t believe these people.
If you tell them any of your wishes or dreams, and if they don’t like your idea, they will not always say it on your face. But criticize about you with a third person.
(I call them the invisible critiques.)
When you hear what he/she said about you from that third person, it will hurt more.
So what one can do?
First, don’t be hurt by that demotivation.
Second, if a person criticizes someone when he is not even present in that conversation, then don’t tell that person your secrets or your thoughts and ideas.
I mean it’s futile and a waste of time.
Maybe his fake sympathy will encourage you. But the moment you find out what he really thinks, all that encouragement will become despair.
“A wise will present himself angry but never become angry.”
It is one of the fundamental element you need to live (a happy life) and when dealing with negative people.
It is easy to lose self-control but hard to restrain oneself from anger and pleasures.
Sometimes it becomes so unbearable to listen to one’s pessimistic words that you may feel like punching his face. But keep your calm and reply wisely.
It is necessary to reply because if you not, he will think you a weak link (saying it from experience).
So reply but keeping your cool. And yes, don’t react to every pessimism. But only when you think someone is attacking your self-esteem severely and without a proper reason.
But if you reply to a negative person’s every comment, you are just feeding his negativity.
If you listen to them carefully, a pessimistic will give you multiple comments and suggestions that are not logical, but you may find some valid points also.
Only take them, and ignore the unnecessary ones.
Watch The Video
Don’t Take Them Seriously
Many people do that they take a pessimist’s comments seriously. Don’t be that fool.
Sorry for using this harsh language, yet the truth is the truth! He is a fool who takes all negative comments seriously.
We all have an inbuilt mechanism, that warns us what is good, and what is wrong.
If that mechanism is telling you to listen to one’s comment, or if it is warning you then wait and think for a minute.
See, if you want to become a businessman with no money, the society may say many things. If you don’t become rich, then you were wrong, and the community was right.
But if you become successful, then the reverse becomes true.
You will face many situations like this, where you have to prove that you are right.
That’s also not mean, killing people for no reason or rape innocent women has a justification. They are the worst crime one can do.
But there are neutral things which one has to prove it is true or false.
So if what you are doing is not a crime, then don’t listen to society.
If you’re following your purpose, then there is nothing that can stop you.
But the only term is, that purpose should do something good for the world.
Ignore Negative People
“A person who have many friends, he actually has acquaintances.”
In the time of Facebook, calling someone a friend becomes very casual. But we have to know that they are our acquaintances, someone we know. And nowadays we accept requests of those we don’t even know. (I also do it)
Not only digitally, but in the real world, we also tend to do that. We call someone our friend so quickly that it doesn’t even make sense.
Friendship is intimate bondage, and we can call a person friend when he becomes like one of our family members. When he/she care about us, he/she helps us in difficult times.
There are not many humans those are lucky to have even ten good friends. But if you got even one, respect that person.
Why did I explain all of this?
Because I wanted to describe this phrase properly; “stay away from negative people, they are not your friends!”
Even if they help you with something, it will be for their self-motives.
So the best thing to do is to avoid them.
Try To Change Them
No, I am not a hypocrite! Read forward, and you will know why.
Sometimes if the pessimist is from our family, like our brother, sister or wife, then it becomes impossible to ignore.
In this case, try to change them.
You cannot change one by scolding or giving a punishment. But if you do things wisely, maybe you become successful.
For example, let’s say your wife become a pessimist.
First, try to find out the reason why she becomes a pessimist. Start a conversation and only listen and suck her negativity. And then after understanding the problem, give her advice.
If that not work, then try to become more friendly. Yes, sometimes our work makes us so busy that we forget we have a family.
So we have to develop a sense of relationship once more.
Then give her books, videos to make her wise. But she will listen to you only if she feels you are sincerely interested in solving her problems.
After getting a positive response from her husband, there is a strong chance she becomes optimistic.
See, you cannot change her if she is not interested in changing herself. So first, you have to make her realize that; she needs to change herself.
I don’t know why I included this point, but you can try talking positively. It may help, the chances are pretty low, as pessimists will not listen to positive things, but then there is nothing wrong to try.
You can give them positive explanations, and yes, you can point out some good things about them. Everybody loves to listen to praise. So it may help you to change the topic.
If you are working in a toxic environment, what the best thing you can do?
Where everybody is speaking negative, not doing their work and just passing their time, where men see women with wrong intentions, what can you do?
The best thing for you is to focus on your work then everything will become quite.
When you do your duty, you will become successful. So mind your business and leave your so-called toxic friends and colleagues.
If you become successful by ignoring, then ignore, because first become rich then become a mentor.
First, become eligible, then try to change the world.
You may ask, isn’t it selfish to not guide my friends?
As I stated earlier, everybody is not your friend, and if you try to help them, then who will help you?
Helping is good, and I am not abstaining you from this great did, but just warning you, don’t try to help everybody.
So, focus on your work and ignore negativity.
Watch this video – https://youtu.be/boRV7otSwfI
When you believe in yourself, no one can demotivate you. So first create confidence that you can do it. Make yourself powerful, and prepare for the worst.
If you don’t believe in yourself, then the tips above are futile. They are just some knowledge that you cannot use for your good.
So focus on developing this attitude, that when someone demotivates you, you respond with calmness and ignore his words.
But if you don’t know what you are doing, and why you are doing. If you don’t believe that you can be successful or you consider yourself not worthy of success, then nothing can save you from negativity.
Be confident and achieve triumph.
Think About Their Situation
Nowadays, it is a trend to call someone negative. Yes, I am not rejecting the fact that there are some people exists who find negativity in everything.
But if someone is suffering from depression and want to share their feeling with you, that’s not mean they are pessimistic.
It can help them to heal because “Dukh Baatne Se Kam Hota Hai.”
So before tagging anyone as a pessimist, observe her/his situation and if you can help, then do it.
I hope you liked this article. I tried to discuss this topic in detail but maintaining simplicity. If you have any question, then please comment below, and I will try my best to solve it.
Thank You. 🙂